With expectations in friendships, it's always a good idea to communicate them so that no one is left guessing. Being a good friend requires us to be proactive about letting our friends know what our expectations are.
My an older family member always said people are attracted to you because of what they could gain from you and once you become irrelevant they’ll pivot. I told them aren’t we all. It’s vice versa. All friendships and relationships are conditional and like you said “even if the conditions are unspoken “.
I'm done caring about having people with conditions as friends. I embrace me as I am, I am at peace with myself, and I have done so much work to have come to this point. I am self mentored and and am my own best friend at this point. I'm open to meeting people but have no expectations anymore. Too many people want me to go low vibe with them regarding hearing their grievances. Too many people have been manipulative and demeaning towards me for there to be any mutual respect. I have one guy friend I can count on to join me at events I'd like to ensure I have someone to enjoy conversation. Am I using him? I'm inviting him, including him, and partly for my sake, but I know he will enjoy my company too. That is mutual, not manipulative, and I'd like a few more friends like that.
With expectations in friendships, it's always a good idea to communicate them so that no one is left guessing. Being a good friend requires us to be proactive about letting our friends know what our expectations are.
thank you for this. navigating friendships isn’t easy.
You get it!
Hey Arinze, nice read. You should listen to "Run Through Walls" by The Script. It captures your thoughts perfectly.
Ouu thanks for the rec! I'll definitely check it out
My an older family member always said people are attracted to you because of what they could gain from you and once you become irrelevant they’ll pivot. I told them aren’t we all. It’s vice versa. All friendships and relationships are conditional and like you said “even if the conditions are unspoken “.
I'm done caring about having people with conditions as friends. I embrace me as I am, I am at peace with myself, and I have done so much work to have come to this point. I am self mentored and and am my own best friend at this point. I'm open to meeting people but have no expectations anymore. Too many people want me to go low vibe with them regarding hearing their grievances. Too many people have been manipulative and demeaning towards me for there to be any mutual respect. I have one guy friend I can count on to join me at events I'd like to ensure I have someone to enjoy conversation. Am I using him? I'm inviting him, including him, and partly for my sake, but I know he will enjoy my company too. That is mutual, not manipulative, and I'd like a few more friends like that.