8 Comments

thank you for this. navigating friendships isn’t easy.

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You get it!

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Hey, Arinze. I've always had this opinion. A major reason why friends grow apart is because the expectations had are no longer needed. Consider two classmates with distinct experiences and interests growing apart post-graduation. After school, there wasn't a need to maintain the friendship and nothing worth their time to talk about.

While this might raise a storm, I also believe romantic relationships are not unconditional.

I enjoy your thought process. This was well thought out. However, I would appreciate if you said a thing or two about how it is my responsibility to communicate my expectations in a friendship. I'd also like to know how it would work and look like exactly.

I'm sorry you didn't find anything interesting this week. Would you like something to think about?

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With expectations in friendships, it's always a good idea to communicate them so that no one is left guessing. Being a good friend requires us to be proactive about letting our friends know what our expectations are.

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Hey Arinze, nice read. You should listen to "Run Through Walls" by The Script. It captures your thoughts perfectly.

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Ouu thanks for the rec! I'll definitely check it out

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My an older family member always said people are attracted to you because of what they could gain from you and once you become irrelevant they’ll pivot. I told them aren’t we all. It’s vice versa. All friendships and relationships are conditional and like you said “even if the conditions are unspoken “.

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I'm done caring about having people with conditions as friends. I embrace me as I am, I am at peace with myself, and I have done so much work to have come to this point. I am self mentored and and am my own best friend at this point. I'm open to meeting people but have no expectations anymore. Too many people want me to go low vibe with them regarding hearing their grievances. Too many people have been manipulative and demeaning towards me for there to be any mutual respect. I have one guy friend I can count on to join me at events I'd like to ensure I have someone to enjoy conversation. Am I using him? I'm inviting him, including him, and partly for my sake, but I know he will enjoy my company too. That is mutual, not manipulative, and I'd like a few more friends like that.

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